Category Archive: Peanut Gallery

Words from the kinkologist

Jan 15

New Rule: No Texting Until the Third Date

As I’ve started dating more, I’ve been noticing a trend that I’m finding is one of my most monumental turn-offs to date. I just met you. You seem cool and I want to get to know you better, so I ask you out, or agree when you ask me out. We exchange numbers and figure …

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Nov 03

The Grace of Being the Bad Guy

It just happens sometimes. You’re in a relationship—whether it be romantic, familial, or just friendly—and things are going well. Until they’re really not. Suddenly the other person loathes you for no reason you can figure out and they’re blaming you for all their problems. At some point you may hear their gripes second-hand from a …

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Oct 20

The Way to Your Honey’s Heart: Chocolate Chip Banana Bread

  Everyone loves a partner that can cook. At least I’ve never heard of anyone who didn’t. And why wouldn’t you? Not only does it result in delicious food, but it’s totally hot to watch someone you love cook for you. (Particularly if that someone is wearing a short skirt and garters, and has to …

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Oct 13

Today on a Very Special Peanut Gallery…

Tuesday was National Coming Out Day. Now, I’m pretty darn out. I’m openly kinky and poly to pretty much everyone I know, and usually strangers if I can fit it into a conversation. I believe in having no shame about one’s sexuality. But there is one major part of my sexuality that many people don’t …

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Oct 06

Kinkster, Know Thyself

You know what’s awesome? Communication. It’s my favorite. It’s like Christmas, cake, and kittens rolled into a giant ball of yay. But even with the best of intentions, everyone sucks at it sometimes. We forget to mention important points out loud, or assume our partner is feeling certain things that they aren’t. (As you know, …

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Aug 18

Your Kink is not My Kink.

“Your kink is not my kink.” It’s a phrase you’ll hear a lot in the sex-positive community, usually used in much the same way a white person might say, “I don’t want to sound racist, but…” It’s a caveat that you put in front of an offensive statement when you don’t want people to think …

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Aug 11

Peanut’s Geeky/Sexy Reading List

“We need to make books cool again. If you go home with somebody and they don’t have books, don’t fuck ‘em. Don’t sleep with people who don’t read!” –John Waters, a wise man and a snappy dresser.   You’ve probably heard the phrase, “If you can’t talk about sex you have no business doing it.” …

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