Geek vs Life

The Big Cheese, reminiscent of the look you give when you proudly stand at the top of your empire built on the backs of the exploited working class. The Remote Control, the gesture that brings forth memories of the greatest of all modern sports, channel surfing. The Mohawk, the hairstyle that, no matter how cool it is (I had one too, and no, you can’t see pictures), always has a twinge if silliness about it. What do these things have in common? A fat Italian man with indigestion. It’s a Wii, Wario!

When you play a lot of Wii, you get used to performing really stupid acts. When you have a social life, your friends will also get used to performing really stupid acts. It’s what makes the Wii fun. Many a board games have made fortunes off of making people look ridiculous. WarioWare: Smooth Moves simply takes it a step further.

The game itself, for single player is really short. The graphics aren’t terribly impressive. The pace is incredibly fast, and most of the time you screw up is because you have no idea what exactly you’re supposed to be doing. The mini-games, which is all this game really is, loosely tied together by a vague plot, are simple and last about 5 seconds each, as you go on your marathon rounds for each plotline. Overall, there are about 200 different mini-games spread out in the game. What makes this game fun is the multiplayer. Up to 12 people can play together, using only one Wiimote. The games are fast, the controller is passed from player to player, and all players need to pay attention because order is random. If you’ve modded your Wiimote with a handcuff for safety, this may be the time to take it off.

I’d give WarioWare: Smooth Moves a 6 out of 10. Rent it for parties, and don’t erase your save data.

(Originally printed in the Shoreline Community College student paper, the Ebbtide.)

I opened the door to my office, Max trailing behind me. I looked off to my side, noticing that the coat rack was amazingly empty today. “What happened to the noose collection?” I asked as I straightened my hat walking out the door. “It’s a surprise!” my little friend informed me. A strange feeling of dread and familiarity washed over me. I looked back at him, his shark-like grin threatening to gnaw the face from anything that stood in our way. My friend, he’s a rabbit. Me, I’m a dog. Sam. But, don’t worry. We’re freelance police.

One of my favorite games growing up was Sam and Max Hit the Road. It was an old click adventure using the Scumm engine that Lucasarts developed for their Maniac Mansion. What made this game always stand out in my head was the depth of sarcasm, depravity, wit, and uncommon language (almost like watching a Kevin Smith flick) that usually didn’t find its way into games. It only had the one game, but found its way to Saturday morning cartoons, bringing the flavor from the game to the television. And there, I thought it had died. To fade into obscurity, with only a small cult following consisting of me and about 4 other guys that came into the comic shop I used to work at.

Last year, Telltale Games announced that they were bringing it back, using the technique of episodic content to provide smaller adventures which you could purchase, or an entire season. To date, four of these episodes have made it to home computers. They are, well, short, and can be frustratingly difficult at a couple points, but the humor is there, if not the cell shading. The musical numbers have proven to be most entertaining, and the cast is small, but endearing. I would defiantly suggest picking up an episode or two.

Overall, I’d give the series an 8 out of 10. Available through Telltalesgames, or via Gametap.

(Originally printed in the Shoreline Community College paper, the Ebbtide.)

Congressmen and women, led by representative McCarthy of New York, are trying to institute another ‘assault weapons ban’. For those of you around when the first one went into effect in 1994, you know how useless it was in preventing/stopping crimes from occuring or continuing, even escalating.

Please, support the online petition to send a message to congress, declaring that we will NOT allow the government to circumvent our Human Right, under the Constitution of the United States, to protect ourself, our families and our friends, even innocent strangers, from those that would wish them undue harm.

The petition which I signed this morning as #1779 (at the time of posting, the number of petition signers was 5589): http://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeaction/409898348

The following link is the full text of the bill they want to pass: http://www.govtrack.us/congress/billtext.xpd?bill=h110-1022

You should read through the things they want to ban, it may suprise the heck out of you, as it did me. The one that got me is this bit:

`(L) A semiautomatic rifle or shotgun originally designed for military or law enforcement use, or a firearm based on the design of such a firearm, that is not particularly suitable for sporting purposes, as determined by the Attorney General. In making the determination, there shall be a rebuttable presumption that a firearm procured for use by the United States military or any Federal law enforcement agency is not particularly suitable for sporting purposes, and a firearm shall not be determined to be particularly suitable for sporting purposes solely because the firearm is suitable for use in a sporting event.’.

What that means is rifles such as the M1 Garand that brought home millions of Americans safely from Germany and the Pacific would be banned from sale or purchase.

Here are two things of interest

1)The fonts on the signage has been around since your Grandpa was your age. Here’s a link to a guy’s page that has them all. Make your own signs! (Do yourself a favor and DO NOT use the “Clearview” imitation versions. That’s a clear copyright and intellectual property violation. The older ones are public specification.)

2)Here’s a map of the entire system constructed during the Eisenhower administration. Click on the map to see the full size.